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Changing Other People

What are you trying to resolve within yourself when you try to fix the world or heal your siblings or fix your parent’s marriage or change your partner? Every time you insist that something outside of you must change in order for you to feel better, what part of you is needing relief that you think this outer change will bring? How can you provide that relief to yourself? If ________ was different, what do you think you’d finally feel? And what if you gave yourself the permission to feel that way ahead of/irregardless of that thing ever changing? We trap ourselves in a world where we have no control and are at the mercy of outside forces when we rely on external changes to provide us with internal relief. This doesn’t have to be our reality. We really can generate our own feelings of self worth, tranquility, trust, love, and peace regardless of what is going on around us. When I was experiencing turmoil or traumatic events or abuse, this seemed impossible. It seemed like a blatant lie that was fabricated by a crazy person. But it’s true; the power lies within you. It’s not about what’s happening out there. The only person we have any control over is ourselves. You can lament this reality or you can use it to your advantage and let it redefine your amazing life. We can allow ourselves to be affected by and obsessed with other people or events which leaves us feeling powerless and hopeless. Or we can look at what these people and events are bringing up inside of us that we get to heal and develop, making it possible for us to navigate the world as self-assured adults who are secure in our sovereignty over our internal world. I know this can get heady and feel a little out of touch. I plan on doing much more teaching around this topic, as it was the thing I failed against the hardest when I began my journey towards self love and self development (which I’m of course still on✨).

In which area of your life do you want to call your power back to yourself? Where do you need to recenter? Where have you been putting expectations/responsibilities on outside forces or people that don’t belong there? Where do you need some relief?

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