What is your inner dialogue like?
With my clients (and with myself) I notice a lot of cruelty in the way that we speak to ourselves, & I have to address it.
There is a huge difference between "get over yourself, just move on, get over yourself , no one is looking at you, you’re not that important" VS. "hey love, I see that you're really distressed right now. I completely understand. That's okay. Want me to hold your hand until you feel ready to talk about it? Just let me know what you need, I'm right here. I love you.”
Same situation, two completely different approaches to the self.
You get to choose which approach you adopt...and the loving choice is always the right choice.